Finally, all is right with the world, college football season has arrived. No longer will I have to endure watching ESPN Classics or CSS broadcast stuff like the 1986 Georgia – Clemson game. Here’s a quick preview of what we will have answered over the next few months:
Joe Paterno. Will he coach from the booth or on the sidelines? Will the Big 10 allow his Little Rascal on the sidelines? Was he really the inspiration for Frank Constanza and which of the student managers has to hold the drool cup?
Bobby Bowden. Can he bring Florida State back from the brink? How many times can he say “dad-gum” on live TV? Does he have any more relatives he can hire?
The BCS. Can USC make it back to the BCS Championship Game? Will Les Miles need surgery to have his foot removed from his mouth? Can players at any school other thanVanderbilt even spell BCS?
New Orleans. The Crescent City will host the Sugar Bowl and the BCS Championship, will the city, still rebuilding, be able to pull it off? How many New Orleans citizens will have a breakdown trying to choose which tourist to mug? Perhaps, to make sure that some fans actually get to the game, some enterprizing vendor will come up with bullet-proof vests with the team logos on them.
Possible Headlines:
Phil Fulmer Resigns-Will Become New Syracuse Mascot.
South Carolina Fans Injured in Tragic Visor Accident: Spurrier Blames School Administration.
Pete Carroll to Give Keynote Speach at HumilityFest ‘07.
Worst Nickname in Sports: Slippery Rock Pride. Enough said.
1 Comment
September 8, 2007 at 2:13 am
Leave Fat Phil alone. He’s has enough without your lame jokes about his weight. Beating anorexia is not any easy thing, but he’s done it.