Here in America we get holidays off, in Russia people get off on holidays! Gov. Sergei Morozov has decreed Sept. 12 a Day of Conception and is giving couples time off from work to procreate. Couples who give birth nine months later on Russia’s national day (June 12) will receive money, cars, refrigerators and other prizes. I know it’s hard to believe, but participation in the Diaper Derby has actually doubled in each year of the event. Do you know what that means…it means that hundreds of people said no, to a paid day off for “you know what”…for TWO YEARS RUNNING! And we were frightened of these people for 40 years? To make it more insane, the winner of this Baby Bonanza gets a free car.
The more I think about it, the madder I get, those stinking Russians are stealing our ideas again! A paid day off for procreation, why in America we’ve been doing that for years. We’re paying millions of people to do the Mattress Mambo every month, but we do it better. Instead of a car or refrigerator we give monthly checks, one day off in Russia, heck they get everyday off here, and we don’t just give prizes for one little babushka, in America we pay for all of them! Take that you bunch of commies!
